september 30

" there are only two ways to live your life...
one is as though nothing is a miracle,
the other is as though everything is a miracle."
(~ albert einstein )

xoxo,
gee

september 28

she wonders,
is he in there?

she walks by,
barely a turn of the head,
just the eyes
just enough,
noticing a shadow

gasping,
wondering,
could it be... ?

yes,
it could be

footsteps echo
through a hollow hallway...
hers, times infinity
heart pounding, each step
each echo

stainless kitchen,
empty
stainless sink,
filling

hot, soapy wetness
cunning bubbling blanket,
floating above

the forgotten cutlery, the
innocent bystander,
resting below

"where do you want this?"
he startles her

heart pounding,
furiously

not looking up she nods her head,
barely

a motion
inviting him closer
to the sink,
to her

white china plate
smeared
with barbeque redness
disappears into the wet abyss

she thrusts her hands in

fingers slicing through
the bubbles
knife slicing through
her finger

she steps back,
pulling her hands out,
up, with a gasp

he lunges forward,
gripping her wrist,
raising her trembling hand
higher

all runs red,
warm
salty
sweet
down her hand,
over his

for a moment
her wide eyes follow the red,
twisting,
cascading river

with her free hand
she releases his grasp,
lifting his palm to her lips

running her tongue
up the center of his hand
to his middle fingertip,
she stands trembling,
dizzy,
breathless

immediately

completely

intoxicated

on
blood
and
barbecue

xoxo,
gee

september 25

my greatest wealth is the deep stillness in which I strive and grow and win what the world cannot take from me with fire or sword ( ~goethe )

xoxo,
gee

september 9

september 6

perhaps, long ago, it went
something like this...

"Gargantuan!"
"Whaaat?"
"It was gargantuan!"
"That's not even a real word."
"Yes, it is."
"Nuh-uh."
"It is, too. It means really big."
"Then why don't you just say 'the frog was really big'?"
"...Gee?"
"Whaaaat?!"
"Nuthin."

I smile at you over the cuff of my yellow sleeve as I chew on it, wondering if you realize how silly you are. I giggle and listen and chew as you spin your familiar, fantastic frog-catching tales for me again... this one, about the one that got away.

"Want some?" I hold up my favorite Scooby-Doo cup, filled to the middle with warm cocoa.

"K..." you say, reaching.

"Careful. It's hot." I caution, watching your fingers curve around the handle. "Just don't get your yucky spit on it if you blow on it."

You look at me and roll your eyes for a second, bringing your gaze down to the cuff of my sleeve, to my chewing and sucking on the fabric.

"Cut it out..." you say with a hint of a grin.

"What?"

"That." You tip your head toward me, motioning to the sleeve between my teeth.

I pause, looking right into you, wondering if you know that I love you. I whack the top of your knee with my soaking wet sleeve.

"Gross..." you cringe.

"You are..." I grumble.

I watch as you lift Scooby to your mouth and blow across the warm, liquid-chocolate treat.

"Frogman?" I whisper...

You lean toward me, grinning, sighing. "Whaaaaat?!"

Hoping that you just blew your lovely spit across my cocoa, I giggle...

"Nuthin'..."

xoxo,
gee

september 5

come here,
I want to show you something...
I want to show you everything.

I want to show you my radiance
I want to shine my light
directly into you
I want you to feel it burn
right through to the core of you
and as I am fully illuminated,
I want you to melt
into the warmth of me,
to bathe in my glow,
to recognize my pureness,
my innocence, forever untouched,
never defiled.

look closely now...
here, my authenticity is exalted
this is where you will see the real me

I want to show you my darkness

I want to pull you
into my depths and wrap
my suffocating void around you
at the bottom of my well,
I want you to witness
my excavation
as I overturn every stone
by it's most jagged edge,
I want you to hear my nervous laughter
as it rips through the flesh
of my delicate fingertips
I want you to see me cry
as my blood spills
back into the earth

look closely now...
here, my authenticity is rooted
here is where you will see the real me

and when
I stand in the light
of a new evolution, please
don't shield my eyes

just
hold
my
hand

and when I crawl under the porch to die,
please don't reach your hand through the lattice,
frantically searching for a leg to pull

just take off your shoes
get on your knees
and crawl in next to me

you
don't have to do
anything

just
be
with
me

be with me as I live
be with me as I die

come here,
I want to show you something...
I want to show you everything.

xoxo,
gee

september 1

"I am so glad that you are here --
it helps me to realize how beautiful my world is."
( ~ Goethe ~ )

xoxo,
gee