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j u n e 2 0 0 5

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happy fucking june
happyfuckingjune.jpeg

june 30
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I awaken
to your radiance

your light
fills the sky in me!

divine light, shower me!
filter through my blueness!
pour every blessed drop into my soul!

somewhere between heaven and hell,
I weep with the moon, with
stars in my eyes

my precious holy one, gather quickly
this sweetness
and claim it
as yours!

xoxo,
gee

june 29
nightinmytown.jpeg

(*ouch*)

it's ok...
it's fine...

yeah,
it's good

see...?

it's
all
good

xoxo,
gee

june 28
watchingme.jpeg

I create, carving out a space for
that which is sacred to me

a labor of love,
walking hand and hand
with loneliness

fear knocks, repeatedly...
I smile, closing the door

come when you can...
come when you are ready

I will be in the backyard, laying in the grass
melting clouds
with my eyes

xoxo,
gee

june 27
allaboutyou.jpeg

today,
monday afternoon...

the thoughts in my head,
the look in my eyes,
the grin on my face...

what's it all about...?

you, baby

it's
all
about
you

xoxo,
gee

june 26 ~ happy birthday to me
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"no matter what my birth may be,
no matter where my lot is cast,
I am the heir in equity
of all the precious past.

the art, the science, and the lore
of all the ages long since dust,
the wisdom of the world in store,
are mine, all mine in trust.

the beauty of the living earth,
the power of the golden sun,
the present, whatsoe'er my birth,
I share with everyone.

as much as any man am I
the owner of the working day;
mine are the minutes as they fly
to save or throw away.

and mine the future to bequeath
unto the generations new;
I help to shape it with my breath,
mine as I think or do.

present and past my heriatge,
the future laid in my control; --
no matter what my name or age,
I am a master-soul."

(the heritage by abbie farwell brown)

xoxo,
gee

june 25
goodbye38.jpeg

a tribute...

38 handstands

to my last day
at 38...

(*cheers*)

may I never
act my age

xoxo,
gee

june 24
sunsetandme.jpeg

your evening bliss
pours through the pine,
you shower me
with light, divine
your sun sets with
outrageous grace,
kissing
tears now
from my face

thank you for this life...
thank you for this love...

xoxo,
gee

june 23
dinnerdishes.jpeg

last night,
after dinner...

wondering...
"where the hell did all of these dishes comes from...?"

washing...
washing more...
washing more and more...

wandering,
gathering the strays

the measuring cup,
there on the window sill, next to my boy...

"finished with this...?" I ask
"wait...!" he says

lifting the pyrex up to his
perfect nine year old grin, he sips
the last few drops of chocolate milk

"silly goose...",
I smile

"mm hmm...",
he nods

"and whose empty popcorn bowl is this?" I ask

blank faces...
no answers...

"huh..." I say

I gather
and gather

and wash
and wash...

feeling
grateful

I thank the goddess
for these dishes to wash...

how I thank the goddess for the ones
giving me so many goddammed dishes to wash...

xoxo,
gee

june 22
dancing.jpeg

" but, ya know,
why would you wanna
dance with somebody
who doesn't wanna dance
with you,
right...?"

(adam sandler as robbie hart, "the wedding singer")

xoxo,
gee

june 21
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there are infinite blessings here
in this world...

blessings beyond comprehension,
blessings so amazing, so beautiful...

blessings we simply will never really see,
fully realize,
or ever completely understand...

they
exist

they
are
here

I feel them all around me
whenever I stop looking
for them

xoxo,
gee

june 20
thankyoupete.jpeg

thank you,
pete...

xoxo,
gee

june 19
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"doubt that the stars are fire;
doubt that the sun doth move;
doubt truth to be a liar;
but never doubt I love..."

(~ william shakespeare, from "hamlet" ~)

xoxo,
gee

june 17
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"what do you want, gee?"
he asked

"you..."
I answered

xoxo,
gee

june 16
solong.jpeg

ya know,
you're right...

it's too late to begin
second guessing

I feel it,
and so I say it

I feel it,
and so I write it

I feel it,
and so I look at it

I feel it,
and so it is...

you reminded me, baby

thank you

thank
you
for
reminding
me...

"what have I become,
my sweetest friend?

everyone I know
goes away in the end

and you can have it all
my empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

if I could start again
a million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find
a way..."

( "hurt" lyrics, trent reznor)

xoxo,
gee

june 15
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inside out
and
upside down
and
twisted like
a motherfucker...

that's how you leave me feeling,
you know

it's
magic

it's
crazyassmotherfucking
magic

xoxo,
gee

june 14
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your words
this morning
bring tears to my eyes,
I said

they burn
they sting

the tears,
I mean

your words bring to me a lovely ache,
I said

...one I've had for you
since the moment you stopped

for
me

life can be
so beautiful,
my love...

life can be
so terribly unfair...

xoxo,
gee

june 13
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today, I have these three wishes...

1.) that we all feel a little better than yesterday

2.) that you feel my love for you, stronger than before

and

3.) that Scott Wieland will call around noon and say, "so, gee... how have you been?"

( hey... here's the deal... be nice... I'm not feeling too great... and by the way, these are my freakin' wishes... k...? *poke* grinnn...)

xoxo,
gee

june 12
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I dream that she stands above me and laughs...
my eyes are closed and I smile...

she tells me that we all have a role to play... it's a perfect match, she says...
you're a perfect 'monica'...

I roll my eyes, still closed, and laugh out loud...
who is monica and why I am chosen to play her, I wonder...

I feel her paint a symbol on my cheek...
I sense that it is red... a red as red as blood...

she steps back quickly as it runs down the side of my neck,
cool and strange...

suddenly, it all seems so familiar...

xoxo,
gee

june 11
fast.jpeg

I asked you
how fast we were going
simply because
I love going fast
like that
with you...

xoxo,
gee

june 10
theporch.jpeg

somehow,
I just know
that this porch will
miss you, too...

xoxo,
gee

june 09
legsofgee2.jpeg

wrapped
up
in
you

wrapped
around
you

you
are
home
to
me

xoxo,
gee

june 07
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wake me...!
wake me, goddess of mine...

something tells me
that the sunrise
is going to be spectacular...!

"Your vision will become clear
only when you look into your heart.
Who looks outside, dreams.
Who looks inside, awakens."

(~ Carl Jung ~)

xoxo,
gee

june 06
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you know, this thing may be taking everything
outta you, she says
but please...
please
don't let it take everything
from you...

xoxo,
gee

june 05
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on the floor

I sit
I wait

help me
help me
please, somebody help me...

I sit
I wait

on the floor

I wonder,
does anyone hear me...?

will anyone
ever call my name...?

xoxo,
gee

june 03
resting.jpeg

just
give
me
five
more
minutes,
ok...?

*sigh*

xoxo,
gee

june 02
goodmorningmylove.jpeg

I wonder
if you know how much
I am missing you...

I am here,
awkward and frightened,
facing this alone

yet
I say,
my battle...
my battle...
this is
my battle...
leave me to fight
my battle...

here,
gracefulness escapes me

a blanket of weariness
drifts along the void

I am
awkward and frightened
facing this alone

I am
awkward and frightened
facing this with you

the blanket begins to
warm me,
tickle me...

I
smile

and
I
rise

xoxo,
gee

" the world is so empty if one thinks only
of mountains, rivers and cities;
but to know someone who thinks and feels with us,
and who, though distant is close to us in spirit,
this makes the earth for us an inhabited garden."

( ~ goethe ~ )

june 01
afternoonlight.jpeg

it's all about the light,
I said

it's always
about
the light

xoxo,
gee

all art, photos, and writing displayed on this site
are original creations
by me, gee cobain
(unless otherwise noted)

~ all rights reserved ~

*thankyouverymuch*

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