up and out
before the sun,
I begin my day
"I am a sky where spirits live.
stare into this deepening blue,
while the breeze says a secret.
when someone asks what there is to do,
light the candle in his hand.
(the beautiful words of rumi)
I'm quite happy
I'm just happy
to be dancing
even if I'm in the kitchen
and it's 2-fucking-a.m.
"sick of it all"...
~ in my mind and heart ~
I haven't felt t-h-i-s good...
my goddesses, my gods, my divine companions...
you take me by the hand
and leap with me across feather pillows in the sky!
your laughter rings clear
through the breeze
from crisp, falling leaves above me
to the dying blades of grass beneath me...
and when I pause to capture
one more awkward handstand just for you,
I feel you tremble to your core
with a joy almost too precious to recognize...
it is yours
I pray for us...
some little known facts about me...
* I was born in queens, new york --
have lived in colorado, rhode island,
massachusetts, & new hampshire --
I now call maine my home
* I am in love with sunlight -- especially
late-day sun & sunsets
(yes, in spite of having malignant melanoma)
* I have the best burst-out-loud belly laughs
when I'm with my kids
* I'm a sucker for flowers & chocolate
* I have never smoked a cigarette, ever
* I once had a boyfriend who spelled out
"I luv u" in stolen pumpkins on my front lawn
* my dearest-friends-ever are named pete and chance
ohhh, and one more..
* I love to be held
" I said that's life
and as funny as it may seem,
some people get their kicks
stompin' on a dream
but I don't let it, let it get me down
'cause this fine old world,
it keeps spinnin' around
I've been a puppet, a pauper, a pirate,
a poet, a pawn and a king
I've been up and down
and over and out
and I know one thing
each time I find myself flat on my face
I pick myself up and get back in the race..."
(~ lyrics to "that's life", frank sinatra ~)
" how I wish you were here.
we're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl,
year after year,
running over the same old ground.
what have we found?
the same old fears,
wish you were here. "
(waters, gilmour / pink floyd)
I am hurting way too much
too tired to write...
too lost to find the words
sing it for me, jonathan... will you?
"...my mind is laughing at me.
tell me why am I to blame
aren't we suppose to be the same
that's why I will never tame
this thing that's burning in me
I am the one who chose my path
I am the one who couldn't last..."
(lryics to "did my time", KoRn)
yeah... that's right.
the center of me
that's where it all comes from...
that's where it all goes.
it... this... you...
the only words that come to me
right now are these...
I didn't know how magical a saturday in october
until I spent one